A new wave is coming–some say a new order. Last June, we gathered in Central Park. Our goal was the avocado. Two years ago, 23 of us were killed by the Sharlac forces in Wisconsin while fighting to liberate the peach. Now, following the death of Cora the Destroyer, we need a new stand. The regime is weak and old. The Sharlac Premier Sbovdn cannot contain the movement we are building. Crack by crack, the dam will break. Lobster is our next target. 

The Sharlacs have forced us to ingest shell after shell along with the tender meat of our crustaceans for long enough. We will not suffer any further. The lobster’s meat is delicate, it is soft, and it is fibrous. The Sharlacs, resting in Carthapian Fortresses, know this and choose to make us suffer. We are destroying ourselves by consuming keratin and razor sharp shards and they are laughing.

Like Tantalus or the Danaïdes we will never be able to appreciate that which is most delicious. But we will triumph as we have triumphed before. Just as we no longer have to eat the brown bulbs of the avocado or the grainy pits of the peach there will come a day when we no longer have to eat lobster with the shell on. That day will come soon. For now, spread the word: lobster tastes better without the shell.