“Cool” First-Year Proctor Looks Other Way on Floor’s Dog-Fighting Ring

By CHRISTIAN FILTER Nov. 1, 2018

According to multiple reports, Daniel Havard ‘19, proctor of Coleman 1st Floor, has gained the trust and admiration of his proctees for being the “cool” proctor. A relaxed view on hard alcohol violations, a willingness to handle noise complaints in-house, and a tendency to look the other way on the floor’s underground dog-fighting ring has earned him this reputation. Continue reading ““Cool” First-Year Proctor Looks Other Way on Floor’s Dog-Fighting Ring”

Halloween: It’s a Spooky Time for White Men

By AINE LAWLOR Oct. 31, 2018

[Content Warning (Not Satirical): This article features topics of sexual assault.]
BOO! Did I getcha? I’m the ghost of actions past, the monster hiding under the bed (or perhaps, unwillingly, on the bed), here to haunt white men for all the things they may or may not (but statistically very likely, in fact, almost 100%) have done. Continue reading “Halloween: It’s a Spooky Time for White Men”

Dining Hall Greeters Given License to Kill Students Who Don’t Say Good Morning

By JEFF PRICE Oct.24, 2018

Following President Clayton Rose’s new mandate to pursue “radical hospitality,” the BSG has ratified an article to its constitution enshrining greeters’ right to use lethal force on students who don’t smile and say “Good morning.” Continue reading “Dining Hall Greeters Given License to Kill Students Who Don’t Say Good Morning”

Pre-Med Student Pulls Gastroenterology Paper Out of His Ass

By ELIZA JEVON Oct. 17, 2018

It was the typical grind of midterms week at Bowdoin College. Pre-Med student Jimmy Blaine was swamped. He had put off working on his gastroenterology paper for weeks, and Jimmy’s grade was plunging deeper and deeper into a pile of shit. One more late assignment and he was sure to fail. Continue reading “Pre-Med Student Pulls Gastroenterology Paper Out of His Ass”