Kevin Bacon’s Foot Literally Comes Loose (Get it? He was in 1984’s Footloose)

By ARCHER THOMAS Mar. 30, 2018

Last week, Kevin Bacon revealed that his foot — get this! — his foot actually came loose. Just like Footloose, right? Just like his most successful movie! (Well, if you don’t count A Few Good Men and Apollo 13.) I’ll tell you what, if that happened to me, if my foot just plopped off like a moldy goiter, I’d be pretty Apollo’d, too! Ha! Get it? Like the word “appalled.” Continue reading “Kevin Bacon’s Foot Literally Comes Loose (Get it? He was in 1984’s Footloose)”

First Year Eats Student Digest

By ELEANOR MILDENSTEIN Mar. 26, 2018

After facing several excruciating days of constipation, first-year student Tina Pierce ate Friday’s Student Digest in hopes of alleviating the pain.

“I had been feeling strange ever since I ate the vegan cheese burritos in Moulton on Tuesday,” said Pierce. “I was spending upwards of 8 hours on the toilet a day, but still nothing.” 

Pierce claims to have tried every toilet on campus in hopes that the change in scenery would help. On Friday night, while experimenting with the Baxter bathroom, Pierce had an epiphany.

“I knew I would be stuck for a while, so I pulled out my phone. When I ran out of people to stalk on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn, MySpace, and ChristianMingle, I opened the Mail app,” Pierce explained. “I saw the email from digestengine@bowdoin.edu hidden between a job offer to be a Mystery Shopper and an email from the Bursar’s office that I’ve been too scared to open. Something told me it would be the solution I’ve been looking for – a way to fix my digest engine.”

Pierce reports that the Student Digest, while helpful, did not live up to the usual standards of Bowdoin dining. 

Yesterday May Have Been International Women’s Day, but Don’t Forget Saturdays Are for the Boys

By BROOKE VAHOS Mar. 9, 2017

I’m sure we all saw the Instagram, Snapchat and Facebook posts celebrating the so called “magic” of women yesterday for International Women’s Day. Sure, it was great, but is anyone going to address the elephant in the room? While women are awesome and all, it still stands that the world revolves around men. Plain and simple. Continue reading “Yesterday May Have Been International Women’s Day, but Don’t Forget Saturdays Are for the Boys”

Red Squirrel Spotted on Campus! It’s Like a Gray Squirrel Except It’s Red

By LIAM JUSKEVICE Mar. 1, 2018

A red squirrel was seen chewing on a freaking pine cone on campus today. Most Bowdoin students are likely familiar with the eastern gray squirrel, (Squirrelus isgrayeastus), but red squirrels, (Squirrelus redicus) are a less common sight. So uncommon on campus that we wrote an article about seeing one.
Continue reading “Red Squirrel Spotted on Campus! It’s Like a Gray Squirrel Except It’s Red”