By RODGER HEIDGERKEN Feb. 17, 2017

In an attempt to diversify the Bowdoin community, admissions has announced that it will be not be admitting more than 200 students named Emma or Sam to the class of 2021.

Recent statistics taken by the Admissions Office show that approximately 64% of the enrolled class of 2020 is named either Sam or Emma.

“This is just the beginning of our fight against excessive homogeneity in names,” stated an admissions officer after wait-listing an applicant named Sam Barry. “We were even considering putting a cap on Connors, Jacks, Carolines, Charlottes, and Sarahs, but we still need athletes.”

The absence of anyone from the Admissions Office named Sam or Emma has lead some students to suspect an incident of bias.