By HUGO HENTOFF April 10th, 2016

Ryan Anderson murdered his fifteenth victim last Saturday, making him the most prolific serial killer in Maine’s history. Anderson attributes his record-breaking homicide to the motivational poster hanging in his basement.

“After I had dismembered the sixth blond woman who looked vaguely like my mother, I was exhausted,” said Anderson. “I didn’t think I could keep going. Then, as I was washing large intestine off of me, I saw that poster. I thought to myself, ‘If that cat can keep hanging on, then I sure as heck can keep making skin suits out of Caucasian women.’”

Poster Palace Incorporated, the maker of Anderson’s motivational poster, has been attempting to distance itself from the serial killer. “Poster Palace Incorporated does not condone mass murder,” said one executive. “Poster Palace Incorporated would like to extend its condolences to the families of the victims of Ryan Anderson. Poster Palace Incorporated has always inspired individuals through motivational posters, but it acknowledges the inherent risk in not knowing what the individuals are being inspired to do.”

To avoid further misuse of their motivation, Poster Palace Incorporated has opted to change its slogan, which know reads, “Poster Palace Incorporated: Inspiring Americans to Follow Their Non-Murder Related Dreams Since 1917.”