By JACOB BASKES Jan. 25, 2019
This Tuesday, PETA rolled out a new set of recommendations regarding the ethical treatment and consumption of animals and animal products in the United States. Among these suggestions was an outright ban on hummus. Continue reading “PETA Issues Ban on Hummus”
by BROOKE VAHOS and ELIZA JEVON Jan. 24, 2019
Hailing from Vancouver originally, Remington the Goose decided it was time for a change of scenery. He so hated wearing his threadbare $1050 Expedition Multi-Pocket Parka Coat with Fur Hood. Drag racing his Lamborghini through the snow was getting old (he was generous enough to give his livery driver a break from time to time). So, he had Roger pack up his Louis Vuitton suitcases and book the next flight to Tijuana, Mexico. Continue reading “Canada Goose Heads South for Winter Break”
By ARCHER THOMAS Oct. 10, 2018
The term “dead-ass” has proliferated in casual conversation in recent years. It seems that I can’t walk through Smith or eat at Moulton without hearing this disgusting phrase. Continue reading “Saying “Dead-Ass” is Insensitive to People Whose Ass Has Died”
By AINE LAWLOR Oct. 1, 2018
I have received like four emails and at least six letters saying that I have a court date I need to attend and like why don’t they get that I am not interested. I mean seriously people, I’ve posted about my bae like 4 times – get the message! Continue reading “I Keep Receiving Notifications of a Court Date – Why Do They Not Get that I am Taken!?!”
By SAM HALPERT Apr. 27, 2018
This little piggy went to the farmers market,
This little piggy went for kombucha, Continue reading “Three Little Piggies Went to the Market, Three Little Prosciuttos Came Home”
The Bowdoin Harpoon 